The former CEO of the leading supplier of body armor to U.S. soldiers
in Iraq was charged yesterday with looting the company to bankroll a
lavish lifestyle that included a $10 million bat mitzvah for his
TEN MILLION DOLLARS FOR A BAT MITZVAH????? That's insane, unless he had Moses and Aaron flown in from the Bosom of Abraham to serve as Rabbi and Cantor, Jesus of Nazareth doing Valet Parking, and Muhammad (pbuh), handling security. But on second thought, Moses, Aaron, Jesus and Muhammad would have done a Bat Mitzvah simply for the mitzvah (blessing/honor/commandment). No, he paid Aerosmith, Eagles, Kenny G and Tom Petty cozmic bucks to perform.
My favorite Bar Mitvah story is my own: My mom hired Mr. McGee to make little cakes at everyone's place setting at the reception. Each cake had a "B" on it (for Burl). On the day of the event, Mr. McGee calls up. "Mrs Barer. We have a problem. Try as we might, we can't get the wings to look right."
"On the bees."
"BEES?!!! His name is BURL BARER. Both his first and last name begin with "B" -- the letter B doesn't have any wings!!!"